I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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