remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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