After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
