she was so not down for the gang bang
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Randomize