Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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