Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
