Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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