Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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