I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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