I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
