My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Panties = found
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
