you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
