Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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