The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
