Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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