I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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