are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
