Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
no you cant smoke seaweed
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
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