Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
