we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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