Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
