fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
