Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Randomize