I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
