well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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