you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
