We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
