Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Randomize
