Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
My dick has a subreddit
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
