operation harelip BJ is a go
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Princesses don't give blow jobs
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
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