uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
