i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
