I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
My vagina is very pro this idea
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
