You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
