My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Randomize
