then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
