The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize
