We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
