love makes seman taste better
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
