I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
