But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize