Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
