Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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