Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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