i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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