i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
