GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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