these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize