how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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