they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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