Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
