all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Randomize
